Monday, April 17, 2006
A couple of days ago an acquaintance asked me about my first memory. Coincidentally my father and I had been discussing the same topic that very morning. So I mentioned that my first memory was of watching the blue sky through a window. I recall the white curtain was blowing in the breeze and I could see the clouds moving slowly across the deep endless blue. Somehow it was a reverent feeling that accompanied this. I estimate my age to be around 2- 3 years. It could have even been younger, I just remember this feeling of quiet bliss and the sense that there was little besides my own consciousness and this image. I was happy, I didn't need anything else in that moment. Peaceful. My acquaintance commented that the first memory usually sets a tone for that image for the rest of one's life. I laughed and said " I guess that's why I always feel peaceful watching the sky and must see it everyday through my window. I guess that's also why blues have always been my favourite colours because they evoke that feeling I had with the memory."
This past week and a half I have gotten angry because the white ribbons of jet chemtrails swelled up like tissue paper in water and spread in a fine mist or haze obliterating the view of the pure blue sky. In fact I raged about it. Something I don't do very often. I vowed with my intention that the sky wouldn't be touched by their poisonous ribbons. The thought even arose that I might somehow start a timed intention session with others all over the planet to eradicate the sky pollution. "Bring back the light" I would call it. I know intention is powerful, I may as well use it for a non harmful process.
Last night I had a dream that was so vivid it almost scared me awake. I was standing outside and the sun hadn't yet arisen. I looked up into the sky as was my usual custom. It was dark, deep indigo, velvet with stars clustered here and there. Suddenly I was large, larger, the sky was bending down to meet me. Then I was out in space. I looked back over my left shoulder and saw the earth a beautiful blue green marble. I started to cry. So fragile and precious, so beautiful! Then looking ahead the sky was deep dark space that began to enfold me as I moved further into it. I was consumed with the sensation of falling into that nether region even though a small part of my mind knew that there was no where to fall to. Vertigo and fear ensued as well as the feeling of growing vaster in the star filled void. I shut my eyes. When I opened them again I was once more on the earth in my ususal size. I looked to the east and saw the first rays of the sun reaching over the horizon toward me and as they caressed me bliss flooded my being.
The dream ends here.
Today even though I was very tired I smiled. The sky was a vast endless blue void. There was no trace anywhere of clouds. No wisps, no haze, no trails, nothing at all. Just empty stainless metal sky. Ah Ah Ah! Bliss!
Posted by Ren at 7:51 pm